Life on a Loop
Here it is, December 2021. Almost the new year. This is the time where everyone repeats to one another that they can’t wait for this year to end. They cannot wait for next year. Next year is their year, it’ll be better. We’ve all said it, but I’m starting to wonder wtf that really even means. So what, like when the year ends, life will be better? You mean to tell me on January 1st 2022, you can exhale and feel better about where you were on December 31 2021? How does that work exactly? I understand saying “ I cant wait for this day to end.” I say that when I am tired and ready to sleep and do it all over again. Or when I know the next day is a travel day or something to look forward to. But to say “I can’t wait for 2021 to end” means nothing. I’m still going to wake up January 1st feeling the same as I did December 31st.
The older I get, the quicker time flies. Days turn into weeks, turn into months, turn into years. Who decided to measure time the way we currently do? What if we just stopped living our lives by days, months and years and just live. Now I understand time is a good means of measurement that we’ve all come to know. I know there is a purpose. Measurements of time didn’t just happen. But I’d like for a while to just not live my life by special dates and events that occur within a cycle of a “year”.
It almost feels like we live a life on repeat. Our year starts in January. This is the time to jumpstart new habits and ideas, apparently. For most it’s dead Winter. We use this time to grind and look forward to summer plans. Then we hit the Spring. Another time for new beginnings. By the time we get to Summer, everyone is reflecting on how THE YEAR IS ALMOST OVER!! Ahhh! School lets out, people cram all their fun into the 9 weeks of Summer before returning to the school year and repeating “wow time really flies” some more. Next thing you know, it’s Fall and if you live in a place with 4 season, you grope about it, bitch about how soon Christmas will be here and go crazy between Halloween and New Year’s. At this point, most have had it up to HERE with this year and can’t wait for it to end. Then we rinse and repeat until we die.
Most of our time markers are holidays that no longer hold value in my life. Government deadlines, semesters, quarters. I want to live a life with no time markers. No obligatory holidays, none of that.
What are some ways I can get out of the loop? Get off of this repeat cycle? There has got to be more to life than this cycle of time we live in. Here’s to spontaneity, new life cycles and figuring it out.
